Twentyfifteen and beyond…

I’m going into this post a bit annoyed, which is generally never a good thing… but annoyed for a valid reason. The last post I’d written got lost in the ether somewhere, and reappeared only when I went to begin this one. I came out and went back into the app, and browser on multiple occasions and it wasn’t there…grrrr,

Anyway. It’s the end of the calendar year, and time to look to the next one. I’ve been putting this off for a while now, because of everything that happened this year, which whilst it’s not all been bad, has been pretty bloody major in it’s happenings.

One of the biggest struggles I’ve had has been whether or not to set myself some reasonably attainable goals, or just to set goals as I would normally. I never expect to get all of my goals accomplished within a year, but I am kinda goal oriented as a coping mechanism at the best of times, and this is not that time, so if I set myself goals as normal, am I just setting myself up for failure to begin with, or if, conversely I set myself realistically attainable goals, am I going to end up feeling like I have underachieved to my capabilities? It’s a fine line.

When I was 22 and under the hospital for the random unknown thing that was making me pretty ill, and I got the letter saying that dependent on the outcome of their suspicions I’d be dead by 27, I made a bucket list, and promptly completed it within the space of 18 months. I often wondered at that point whether I’d aimed too low, but actually I did some pretty crazy things on that list… but the things that were wrong didn’t affect so much….

My reasonably attainable goals are all for the most part kinda boring- being able to swim a kilometer again for one would be on there. But that’s something I want to be able to do anyway, especially as it’s unlikely I’m going to be able to run again.. (not that I did that much running before, but I actually enjoyed a treadmill- it hurt less) Other goals that were on last years list that didn’t get achieved would also come back – losing weight, which I was starting to do OK with and then July happened… that one is going to be even harder now, because I can’t do as much as I could before. I could stick a nanowrimo in there too – but my heart wouldn’t be in it. I could do 50k words pretty happily in a month given the time and a meaty enough subject matter – hell I’ve been writing for 15 mins and I’m up to 500 words now- and could even put in being able to get by independantly again, but again it’s something I’d want to be able to do *anyway*.

As for the other ones- ‘normal’ goals (for me)… I’m really lacking inspiration. I’ve got some things I’d like to do, but they won’t be next year, without a lottery win, at least, as they involve money.  I’d like to make it to Northern Scandinavia to see the Northern Lights (preferably at the top end of the KP3 bracket). and I’d like to take a qualification in an holistic therapy with a view to being able to practice it professionally. Aside from these though.. there’s nothing springing to mind…

So feel free to suggest some…


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